1.Señorita
Senorita
Tasty mamacita
Tell me baby what's your name？
Oh Conchita
Won'tcha have a seat-a
Tell me baby who's to blame？
I'll fucking kill the man who has done you wrong
My body's shaking outta control
His name is Larry
Oh, he's really scary
Drinkin' at the fucking bar
Tap His shoulder
Muscles like a boulder
Tell him that he's gone to far
He laughs and tells me to fuckin' fuck myself
Now my blood is boilin' over my soul!
Hey, I'm sorry, I didn't hear that.
Did you just tell me to fuckin' fuck myself？
Yeah!
Well I'm telling you to step outside
Oh really？
Yeah, we got some things to talk about
A little lady named Conchita
Hey!
Yeah, you harmed her
What？ Who said？ Who are you？
Yeah, fuck you you fucking piece of shit
When my fist connects at Larry, falls down to the ground
I see he's cut me with a bottle
My pistol rises, cause it's time to double down
Larry runs, I chase him out full-throttle
Donde estas mi horse？ Ayee
D-digame, donde estas Larry？ Ayee
En los montanes？ Donde en los canyon？
Muy bien, Cold Water Canyon.
Andole, heys, ha, ha, ha
Ah mi llamo Conchita
Yo tengo hambra para tu boca
Mira mi cara
Soy enfuego para tu beso
Mi amorrrrrrr
Watchin' Larry
In his sanctuary
Thinkin' that he got away
With Conchita
Oh my mamacita
Kissing him upon the face
I fuckin' rue the day that I fought for you
Now my mind is spinnin' out of control
Ah I'm sorry mamacita
Oh my little senorita
I？ senorita
2.Flutes and Trombones
Just, ya know
Dude, are you comin' in here at night with a fuckin' flute
And layin' down flute tracks？
You goddamn motherfuckin' stupid piece of shit!
What are you doing out here anyway？
What are you doing here？
You're on my shit about being here
What are you doing here？
What do you have behind your-that's a trombone!
I'll fight you!
3.Ballad of Hollywood Jack and the Rage Kage
This is the ballad of Hollywood Jack and the Rage Cage
Nothing could stop them when Jables and Rage hit the stage
And Hollywood Jack hit the big time and when to make movies
Rage Kage was left far behind in the dust of his dreams
And he grumbled and growled and watched Hollywood Jack on Jay
Leno
He bellowed and said he'd be nothing without help from Kage
He burned up the photos of Jables and Kage doing mushrooms
'Fuck him, I don't need no Hollywood jack anyway'
So Hollywood Jack lived up high on a hill in a bubble
And Rage Kage live deep in the broiling valley below
Yes, the rage Kage bubbled with rage
He looked at the ground
And he looked on the stage
The lava was throwing
And boiling inside the old Kage
As Hollywood Jack climbed the ladder of stardom before him
He watched as his indie credentials flew right out the door
He'd make millions and then he'd go out and he'd make even more
millions
He'd screened KG's calls and snorked coke of the ass of a whore
No one respected him
They just rejected him
No one would represent Kage
Left on the streets of his dreams
He'd would cry, and he'd rage for the stage
Ahahaaa
Then Hollywood Jack got a message that Kage was in trouble
They send Kage away cause he had gone completely insane
So Hollywood Jack jumped upon a jetplane and flew all that night
through
The rain
To be with his friend to see what remained of his brain
Then Hollywood Jack told the doctors： 'You got to retrieve him!'
You've got the technology, use the techniques of your trade
He grabbed their lapels and he screamed 'BY GOD YOU MUST SAVE
HIM!'
Because Rage Kage and I; can't you see that were one and the
same!
Aaaah!
RAGE KAGE!
OH RAGE KAGE!
There'd be magic inside that old name
And you know that you know
When you're going completely insane
Oh the Rage Kage!
Oh the Rage Kage!
All the line we rolled once again
And you know
Yes you know
When you're going completely insane
Nothing and no one could harm the old Rage Kage again,
Nothing and no one could harm the old Rage Kage again,
Nothing and no one could harm the old Rage Kage again,
Nothing and no one could harm the old Rage Kage again,
Nothing and no one could harm the old Rage Kage again,
Hollywood Jack and the Rage Kage were out once again.
4.5 Needs
This one goes to all the disciples out there on the journey that
we call life
You know there's only 5 needs
And Kyle and I have compiled 'em
And awoken them into song
A song that we like to call the 5 needs
First you need the planet
Earth beneath your feet
You couldn't live an instant without that
Then you need the air
Oxygen to breathe
You couldn't live five minutes without that
Then you need the water
The icy cold water
Now, you need some love (love)
You need some love (love)
We only wanted to rock your world (We hoped that we rocked your
world)
The fifth need is to rock your world (We really wanna rock your
world)
It comes before food!
Ohhh
5.Quantum Leap
Since the beginning of time
There had to be a man with a plan
To push man, forward
There was a caveman who, invented wheels
And with those wheels he pushed man forward
Someone had to come up with a new concept for life
Had to push the mighty rock upon the mountain top
Got to work it out
Got to think outside the box
You got to think outside the bun
If you want to be the magic one
Who will lead the trail, blaze the rail
Be the one that you will know must me
Genius
Everybody looks to the hero to lead the way, to change our way
of life
To show us something that is meaningful, yeah
When you look to the hero you must seize the day and shine a ray
of light
Gotta shine it on something that is beautiful, yeah
With the bravery to see, a new form of arts
A blazing of our consciousness, we're talking quantum leap
When you think outside the bun,
It's scary out there
There's also lots of stinky poo
But sometimes when you go outside of your comfort zone
You might find something brand new
To help the humans leap
Forward, do a simple leap
Never be they same, they leap
Across the fucking annals of time
Quantum leap, leap
Einstein, Shakespeare, Leonard Nimoy, Doctor Drew
Bell Biv DeVoe, François Truffaut, Moses, Tenacious D
That's a list of the people who have made the quantum leap
It gets pretty scary out there because they got to know
themselves, yeah
When you look at the people who have made the quantum leap
You feel like a turd cause you haven't accomplished anything
yourselves, no
With the bravery to see, a new form of arts
A blazing of our consciousness, we're talking quantum leap,
leap, leap, leap
Sleep
6.Rivers of Brown
Rivers of brown
All flowin' down
I like to say caca
Rivers of gold
Flowin' from us all
I like to say Cuervo
Rivers of white
Blastin' through the night
I like to say coco
Rivers of brown
Now they're rainin' down
On your phoney crown
Your phoney crown of brown
Fuck yeah yeah
I like to caca
And I like to pee pee
7.F＊ck Her Gently
This is a song, for the ladies
But fellas, listen closely
You don't always have to f＊ck her hard, infact sometimes thats
not right to do
Sometimes you gotta make some love, and f＊cking give her some
smoochies too
Sometimes you gotta squeeze, sometimes you gotta say please
Sometimes you gotta say 'hey'
Am gonna f＊ck you..Softly
Am gonna screw you gently
Am gonna hump you..sweetly
Am gonna bawl you Discreetly
And then you say 'hey a bunch of flowers'
And then you say 'wait a minute Sally'
I think I've got something in my teeth
Could you get it out for me？
Thats f＊cking teamwork
Whats your favourite posish？
Thats cool with me its not my favourite but I'll do it for you
Whats your you favourite dish？
I'm not gonna cook it but i'll order it from ZANZABAR!
And then I'm gonna love you completely
And then I'll f＊cking f＊ck you discreetly
And then I'll f＊cking bawl you completely
but then.. am gonna f＊ck you hard.
8.Kyle Took A Bullet For Me
Kyle took a bullet for me
now I've got to rock for three.
KG and me, don't forget about Tenacious D.
I took a bullet for JB, now I'm in heaven and I can see
your decision to rescue me
was definitely Poops McGee.
No way, no KG, I disagree
Why？
Your decision to rescue me
yeah？
Was a decision to set you free
was definitely Poops McGee.
Wait, this is fuckin' with my head.
I totally thought you was dead
just remember what you said
the medallion's made of bullet-proof lead.
Whoa!
Duet：
Kyle took a bullet for me
now I've got to rock for three.
KG and me, don't forget about Tenacious D.
9.Jesus ranch
It was a big day on Jesus ranch, Jesus ranch,
He was harvesting a big tomato,
It was in the sand, all right.
I'm taking a walk in the woods,
and it's nice outside,
smells of shit,
like a guingbliggygugugualego.
I came upon a silver striped mushroom,
and I falalalalielali,
and I fly fly.
It was a big day on Jesus Ranch
Jesus ranch.
Jesus, I fell in love with baked potato.
That's why I started dance yeah in France.
I'm taking a walk in the woods,
Fuck Yeah.
It's nice very very nice,
smells of shit,
like a guingbliggygugugualego.
I came upon a silver striped mushroom,
and I falalalalielali,
and I fly fly.
Falalalalielali and i fly.
Im gone.
10.Cosmic Shame
(spoken)
if i was gonna say this one thing to y'all, tonight.
I'd say, set the artist free.
I'm talking about this artist, in here.
set it free.
i'm saying quit your day job.
Now i know alot of you people here your saying
'i cant quit my day job! i got kids to feed Jack!'
Quit your day job!
Focus on your craft,
One time,
Before its all over,
you die, youve squandered it.
You fuckin' robots!
And after a couple of years
of you focusing, earnestly on your craft,
K.G and I will swoop in,
and we will encourage you,
to continue!
Or we will say stop.
And then seriously you must stop.
or penalties will be created and enforced.
cos listen.
This is the problem.
(sung)
Sometimes you follow your heart.
sometimes your heart cuts a fart.
thats the cosmic shame.
Thats the cosmic shame.
(spoken)
And i know what you are saying now.
'how come you guys are so fucking good？'
i dont fucking know and i dont like it.
i stay up going,
'ha ha ha. why cant everybody have it？'
cos this is the thing
some people learn it on the streets
some people learn it in the schools.
me and K.G we were fucking born with it holmes!.
Just check it out.
(Jack Black vocal solo)
That shit came off the top of my fucking head Y'all
(Kyle Gass) (Jack Black)
My fucking head Why
y'all
my fucking head why
y'all
my fucking head why
y'all
my fucking head why
y'all
(together)
its a cosmic shame
11.tribute- real lyrics
This is the greatest and best song in the world... Tribute.
Long time ago me and my brother Kyle here,
we was hitchhikin' down a long and lonesome road.
All of a sudden, there shined a shiny demon... in the middle...
of the road.
And he said：
'Play the best song in the world, or I'll eat your soul.' (soul)
Well me and Kyle, we looked at each other,
and we each said... 'Okay.'
And we played the first thing that came to our heads,
Just so happened to be,
The Best Song in the World, it was The Best Song in the World.
Look into my eyes and it's easy to see
One and one make two, two and one make three,
It was destiny.
Once every hundred-thousand years or so,
When the sun doth shine and the moon doth glow
And the grass doth grow...
Needless to say, the beast was stunned.
Whip-crack went his schwumpy tail,
And the beast was done.
He asked us： '(snort) Be you angels？'
And we said, 'Nay. We are but men.'
Rock!
Ahhh, ahhh, ahhh-ah-ah,
Ohhh, whoah, ah-whoah-oh!
This is not The Greatest Song in the World, no.
This is just a tribute.
Couldn't remember The Greatest Song in the World, no, no.
This is a tribute, oh, to The Greatest Song in the World,
All right! It was The Greatest Song in the World,
All right! It was the best muthafuckin' song the greatest song
in the world.
arrrrrgg bi suzimbigig a friggle giggler begae zom zom ba giggle
giggle ga and you a motherfucker
And the peculiar thing is this my friends：
the song we sang on that fateful night it didn't actually sound
anything like this song.
This is just a tribute! You gotta believe me!
And I wish you were there! Just a matter of opinion.
Ah, fuck! Good God, God lovin',
So surprised to find you can't stop it.
All right! All right!
12.Spider Man
This is a song
Spiderman, Spiderman
Does whatever a spider can
Is he strong？ Listen bud
He has the radioactive blood
Hey there! There goes the Spiderman
Ohhh!!!!!
Is he strong？ Listen bud
He has the radioactive blood
Can swing from a thread？
Take a look overhead
Hey there! There goes the Spiderman
Ohhh!!!!!
David Dark comin at 'em
He's got fucking ultimate fighting championship moves!
Here comes Spidey
He's not fucking really Spidey
His moves didn't work because he's fucking Spidey!
Spiderman doesn't look right
He looks like cheap ass!
Spidey wearing the nike shoes
I can see in the fucking BVDs
Outline...oh fuck Stay totally still!
Stay totally still
It's fucking sassafrassquatch!
I've been searching for him for ten years
And now's my chance to capture him
I'm not moving on...fuck!
He's using the web! He's using the web!
Using the Spidey! He's freezing the auidence!
He's using the fucking Spidey
Twa, it didn't hold 'em!
It fucking holds almost everbody
But it didn't work on Sass!
He fucking used a Matrix move!
He fucking used a Matrix move!
Doosh!
Ha! Wanna fucking bowl？
What the fuck is going down？ Somebody help us
He's got the tranquilizer gun!
David Dark's got the tranquil gun
He shot him in the ass with tranquilizer gun
But it didn't...(starts to laugh)
Why's he have his cock out？ That's not right!
Here comes Sassafrass! He's fucking really pissed off
Now what the fuck is happening tonight？
It's looking like a fight!
No! (starts to laugh a lot)
You should've fucking known!
Not to pull out your dick in front of Sass
He'll rip that shit right off! Now you're fucking bummed
What are you doing..no, no no
Don't make him suck your chode! Ah Jesus!
He's sucking on his fucking chode!
He's gonna shoot your fucking load
If I know Sassafrass! He's gonna shoot the load
Ahh! That's non-dairy creamer!
What the fuck？ Thats bad news Bears.
That's a lot of cum! That's way too much Sass cum
Sassafrass...he hasn't fucking done enough
He's dragging him by the foot! He's getting him in position
I don't know what for!
But I think it's finger licking! (laughs once again)
The ultimate bomb, ya'll.
Aww, no. The ultimate fighting championship
He's flinging shit! And he's taking a dump
Ah Jesus. Wait a second, he's got him tricked!
The old stick for the fucking Sassafrass trick
Works every time. See if you can keep him alive
That rips. Life is a great big hang up.
Whenever there's a bang up!
You'll see Sassafrass and Spiderman!
Taking a shit on David Dark!
13.Sasquatch
There were some scientists
Tryin' to figure out the sasquatch riddle
Then they figured out it was a missing link
In search of sasquatch - That was a kick ass In search of..
With Leonard nimoy kicking out the jams Hauwww
He captured imaginations of people all around the globe
His name was sasquatch so I am told
His legend's ancient in the ancient scribe
Of the Indian tribe (apache tribe)
Scientists have proven that the sasquatch he is real
Take a look at the plaster cast of his foot now you know he's
real
Listen real close to the audio tape not human now you know he's
real
Couldn't be a man in gorilla suit no fuckin' way now you know
he's real
Real real real-real real real really-real real
KJ： Don't take this personally, cause it's not about your
playing
JB： No Dude, your drumming is kick-ass. It's just that the D
it's always just been me and KJ
KJ： And we're just not comfortable being a power trio. I hope
there's no hard feelings
Sasquatch (Sasquatch)
We know your legend's real
Sasquatch (Sasquatch)
We know your love is real
Sasq-oh-uh-eww-ahh-atch (Sasquatch)
You and Tenacious D... are... reeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeal
Sasquatch： Tell Tenacious D They were kick-ass
Guy： And who should I tell them said that
Sasquatch： Tell them it was Sasqua- Tell them it was a friend.
Guy： OK
JB： Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey
Sasquatch： You know what... you better tell them it was
Sasquatch. They won't know what friend you're talking about.
Guy： Ok, Sure.
Sasquatch： See ya.
14.Hare Krishna
I wasn't very popular in high school, And here's what I figured
out
It was because I needed it too much, I needed attention
I think I have a, a chromosome, The need-attention-chromosome
I know that some of you have it too
And it's fuckin' tragic
Caused a lot of pain, early on
And this is a song about that
Everything sucked in high school
So I moved to the Miiiidlle Eeeast
I kicked ass with the Krishna
I took on their belief
Sista! A-Hari Krishna
A-Hari Hari, A-Fucking Hari
Now I'm back home now
Momma don't like me
Daddy don't recognize me
A Hari Hari
A-Hari Krishna, oh yeah!
A Fucking Hari
A Hariiiiiiiii
A nigga greeeesss
15.Bowie
Stabbing her with my bowie while i'm naked.
Painted from head to toe i'm so aroused.
Ohh!
Stabbing her with my bowie while i'm naked.
Painted from head to toe i'm so, so aroused.
row row row your boat gently down the stream
merrely merrely merrely merrely life is but a dream.....
Thank you.
16.Sex Supreme
Lyricist：Arthur Herzog, Billie Holiday, Jr.
That's the first thing I say to you
How's it goin'？ Are you flowin'？
Listen honey, thinkin' 'bout
A couple things to say to you
Showin', growin'
And I'd like to place my hands
Upon your fuckin' sexy ass
And squeeze and squeeze
Take off your blouse and your underpants
Then take a look 'cause here me and KG come naked
Out of the side hatch, pretty oils and perfume and incense
Now you're groovin', put on a cool '70's groove
A funky groove to fuck you
The funky groove that fucks you
You guessed it, me, me and KG
It's all about sex supreme
We likes to cream jeans
Have you ever been worked on by two guys
Who are hot for your snatch？ That's what I'm offerin' you
You step into our room and then you smell the perfumes
You lay upon our roundish bed
And then you feel a tickling on your head
It's KG with a feather, the French tickler
Look out baby, he's got the tools
And then you feel somethin' down by your feet
It's me, it's JB, I'm suckin' on your toes
We don't mind suckin' on toes
Good luck finding a boyfriend who sucks toes
Havin' sex with me and KG
Now you're talkin' double-team, supreme
17.Drive-Thru
Lyricist：Frank Loesser
'Kage'
'Yeah？'
'Let's go to this drive-thru'
'Oh, good, I'm starvin''
'Yeah, umm'
'Hello？'
'Huh'
'May I have your order？'
'Yeah, hold on a second, I'm lookin' at the menu'
'Okay'
'Ahh'
'Would you like Special Curly Fries？'
'Please don't, don't offer me anything, I'll, I'll tell you what
I want'
'Okay'
'Umm, okay, you know how you have the six-piece nuggets？'
'Just, uhh, can you gimme just four nuggets？ I'm, I'm tryin' to'
service？'
'Shut up and listen to my order'
'Take the six nuggets and throw two of them away
I'm just wantin' a four nugget thing
I'm tryin' to watch my calorie intake'
'They come in six or twelve pieces, sir'
'Put two of them up your ass
And give me four Chicken McNuggets'
'Then, can I have a Junior Western Bacon Chee？
A Junior Western Bacon Chee, I'm tryin' to watch my figure'
'Western Bacon Cheeseburger'
'A Junior Western Bacon Chee'
'Would you like that with onions？'
'No onions'
'Okay'
'Uhm'
'Junior Bacon Chee, total is 6.57'
'An' I'm gonna go with a fillet of fish sandwich'
'Fillet of fish'
'Since that has less calories, 'cuz it's fish'
'Fillet of fish'
'Now if you could take a Coca Cola
And just go half Coca Cola, half Diet Coke
'Cuz I'm tryin' to watch my figure, tryin' to loose some of the
weight'
'You want it half, half Coca Cola, half Diet Coke'
'Umm, and a small, a small chocolate shake
Because I'm tryin' to watch my figure, not a large, a small'
'It come's in medium-small or medium-large'
'Umm'
'Small chocolate shake'
'Also a small seasoned Curlies'
'Seasoned Curlies'
'Small, seasoned Curlies'
'Okay, I got the small seasoned Curlies, Western Bacon
Cheeseburger
'Okay, huh, fuck my ass, what else？
Give me, uhh, alright, Cherries Jubilee and that's it'
'Cherries Jubilee'
'Wait, Kage, what do you want？'
'Ahh, jeez, let me have a'
'I think I want the regular, uhh, Western Bacon Cheeseburger
Large shake, umm, Cesar Salad'
'Oh God, come on with the order'
'I'm'
'Take forever'
'That's all I want, that's all I want'
'Good, how much is that, sir？'
'That'll be, uhh, 14.75'
'At the window please, will you drive up？'
'Do you have any money？'
'Oh shoot, umm, oh God, yeah, I got, do you have, I got like'
'Give it to me'
'Alright, here'
'Okay, we only have, huh, alright
I'm gonna need to cancel the last two things on the order'
'Okay, thank you, let's go'
18.Inward Singing
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
{Oh my God! Oh my God, I've done it
Cage! Come here, I want you!
What？ What？ God! I'm sleeping, dude!
What are you talking about}
{Oh my God
What？
I did it
What d'ya do？
I've done it. I fuckin' did it.
The most powerful tool in singing technology since yodelling,
dude}
{Oh my God, inward singing
What？
Check it out, it's an invention
And it makes non-stop rocking possible}
{Think about it, man!
Rock singers are only rocking you half of the time!
The other time they're they're they're they're breathing! In!
But not anymore, baby!
Not with inward singing, check it out!}
And then I start some lyrics and you can't believe I'm singing
And I'm never fucking stopping
And I'm always fucking singing
And now you know that I will never stop the fucking singing
I'm like a fucking one-man band
I'm like a fucking one-man band!
{And I can sing like that all fucking night!
Wow}
{It wasn't really non-stop though, there was a slight
Shut up! It is non-stop!
And the other thing is, that when I'm fuckin' singing in
It sounds even better!
Than when I'm singing out! }
{Shut up! Fuck you! You fucking dick!
Always nay-saying everything I create! You piece of shit!
You create something like inward singing! You fucking shit!
You fucking sit in your tower! Fucking nap
What's funny？ You fucking bitch! Fucking fuck you!
Fucking cock ass!!}
{You are fired from that
Well that won't be necessary Jack
Why？ well I am quiting
What？ I quit}
19.Karate Schnitzel
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
God, I'm fuckin' hungry, let me check the fridge
Dude, where's my fuckin' schnitzel？
Hey, wake up
Wake up, you asshole, wake up
What？ Wh？
Wake up
What？
You ate my fuckin' schnitzel
What？
You ate my fuckin' schnitzel
Well it was in there
If you put it in there, then it's fair game
Yeah？
For anybody that wants to eat it
Well then maybe this is fair game, yow
Ow God, hey!
Yeah, that's right its a karate chop!
What are ya doin'？
Well if you didn't like that, how 'bout this？
Kikye, kikye, ow!
20.Hard Fucking
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
We should talk about the hard fucking now, the hard fucking？
Because I think it's pretty common complaint
Yeah the ladies don't really like the hard fucking
You feel like your giving them some extra juice
Their not in to that, you think your like taken it to the limit
Maybe they are though there, into that
You know what the test is？
You just say get on top honey, you do what you like
And then sometimes she'll be fucking you really hard
It's like, wait, well you like that？ You like that？
Slow down I'm going to spurt! Ahh uhh, sorry
You shouldn't have fucked me so hard
21.Rock Your Socks
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 6, 6
It doesn't matter if it is good, it only matters if it rocks
The main thing that we do is to rock your socks off
There's no such thing as a rock prodigy
'Cause rock n' roll is bogus, right KG, right
Only thing that really matters is a classical sauce
And that's why me and KG are classically trained
To rock your fuckin' socks off, give 'em a taste KG, okay
That is Bach and it rocks
It's a rock block of Bach
That he learned in the school
Called the school of hard knocks
Give it up for KG, give it up for me
Give it up for KG, give it up for me
Give it up for rock, give it up for blues
Give it up for everything that is not to lose
Now rock your socks off woman
We'll rock your shit up y'all
Give it up children now to freak your shit out
All right
Now I know what a lot of you are sayin'
I just figured out what I'm gonna do with the rest of my days
I'm gonna get me an oversized guitar
Gain forty pounds and be the next D
Well, I got sour news for you, Jack, It ain't that easy
For instance, are you willing to make the commitment to wakin'
up
At the crack a' noon for deep knee rock squats
Seven or eight at a time in a row？
How 'bout are you willing to make the commitment
To rock hard tasty abs washer board style？
Glistening in the sun, how 'bout are you willin' to make the
commitment
Wakin' up, goin' okay, it's gig time, what T-shirt am I gonna
wear？
Can't decide, can't decide, brain aneurysm
We've been through so much bullshit just to be here tonight
To rock your fuckin' socks off and all we ask in return is so
precious little
All we're askin' you to do is drop trou and squeeze out
A cleveland steamer on my chest
2, 3, 4
Give it up for KG, give it up for me
Give it up for KG, give it up for me
Give it up for rock, give it up for blues
Give it up for everything that is not to lose
Now rock your socks off woman
We'll rock your shit up y'all
Give it up children, won't you freak your shit out？
All right
22.One Note Song
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Jack, yeah, do you think some people？
Do you think that there's some people
That are really, that are actually robots livin' among us？
No, but we can't tell
No, we don't have that technology yet
But Rage, Rage, Rage, yeah, yeah
You know what I was thinkin', stop playin'
I was thinkin' of a fuckin' brilliant song
Yeah, check it out, just do what I do
Okay, just play this note
Then we both keep, just keep both playin' that note
Every once in a while bend it and that's it
And just remember who wrote that song, me baby, me
See it's fuckin' simple, that's one song in the bank
Next song, next song, how could？ But it's just one note, next
Anybody could've wrote it, anybody could've done that one song
Just one note, yeah, but guess who did write it, me
Yeah, but did you write this？
Dude, I did, I told you to do
The bendin' every once in a while
Oh, yeah, you did, fuck
I win, shit, I win, one to nothin'
23.The Cosmic Shame
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
So, um, if I was just gonna say one thing to y'all tonight
I'd say, set the artist free
I'm talking about this artist in here, set it free
I'm saying, quit your day job
Now, I know a lot of you people here, you're saying,
I can't quit my day job, I've got kids to feed, Jack, quit your
day job
Focus on your craft, one time, before it's all over
You've died, you've squandered it, you fuckin' robots
Now after a couple years of you focusing earnestly on your craft
K G and I will swoop in, we will check out your progress
And we will encourage you to continue or we will say stop
And then seriously, you must stop
Or penalties will be created and enforced
'Cause listen this is the problem
Sometimes you follow your heart
Sometimes your heart cuts a fart
That's the cosmic shame, that's the cosmic shame
And I know what you are saying now
What makes you guys so fucking good？
I don't fuckin' know and I don't like it
I stay up going fuck, why can't everybody fuckin' have it？
'Cause this is the thing
Some people learn it on the streets
Some people learn it in the schools
Me and K G, we were fucking born with it, homes
Check it out
That shit came off the top of my fuckin' head y'all
Oh God, why？ It's a cosmic shame!
24.Cock Pushups
Lyricist：Jack Black, Kyle Gass
Do you think that um, do you think that when the album, when
this is out
Yeah？
Do you think it will make us um, more attractive to the ladies？
Pshh, yeah, in fact, I been getting ready
Yeah？
Yeah, I been doin' cock pushups
Cock pushups？
Yeah
What are those？
It's where you fuckin' lay down flat on the ground
Yeah
And then you let your boner lift you up off the ground
No, that's, that'd be impossible, your cock can support your
whole weight？
Well not at first
Yeah？
But over time
Hmm, how, how many pushups can you do？
Cock pushups？
Yeah
I guess you could only do one really
Yeah, well one is all ya need
25.Things I Want
Tenacious D Feat. Sum 41
Ho, ho, ho
So many Christmas letters
So many wishes
Lucy wants a squeezy doll
Jimmy wants a moon rocket
Oh, this list's rather long
Yaa, yah
Hey, now Santa I'm writin' to you
'Cause there's a lotta cool shit I want
I know I've been naughty
But cut me some slack
'Cause there's a lotta cool shit I want
So here's my list-a
So check it a twice-a
I want
A solid gold Harley with machine guns on the front
I want
A Motley Crue lunch box filled with sticky buns
I wanna see through jump suit that fits me tight
I want all of The Beatles copyrights
I wanna chop Florida off the map
I want Pamela Anderson's Speedo top
Here ya go, Santa
That's my Christmas list
That's all the cool shit I want
But wait a minute, Santa
Here's some things I missed
There's still a lot of cool shit I want
So here's my list-a
So check it a twice-a
I want
A time machine and a BB gun
I want
A statue of Moby on the surface of the sun
I want
To party naked on a school bus full of nuns
I want
A bumper pool table and a robot pelican
There ya go, Santa
I'm sure you'll agree that
There's some really cool shit I want
I know I've been naughty
But I guarantee
That I deserve every single one
So take my list-a
And check it a twice-a
I know I've been naughty
But life ain't nice-a
Please I still-a
Need some more shit-a
I want
I diamond hyena, shootin' fire from his butt
I want
A cannibal chef to cook me sweet and sour butt
I want
A magical sleigh that's pulled by flying skunks
I want
All the cool shit I want!
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